Rover and The Super Walmart
by Grrittss
Summary: AU pepoel work at walmart and Voltemort kills harry but he comes up as a ghost and visits OC, the son of Ron and Mcgonnagle. Tehn stuf happins.
1. Chapter 1

**AN; OMG i just got a j9ob at wAllMarT afew dayes ago! and i thout it woud bee kool if the peEps of hARRY pOTTER GOt jobz ther. **

**ive only read a few chaps of hP but i think i got teh basci idae oft he story by reeding soem of teh fanficotin.**

Once upon a time in the land of wally world, sma"s club and more lived a wallmart named super wallmart. They liked to sell things to shoppers because otherwise they wnet hungry and had to eat at sushee resteronts (AN;;EW!!).

Harry potter worked at The super wallmart He was really funny so he called it The Souper Wallmart because tjhey sold soup there (AN; thats a funny pun my sissy helpefd me with.) He had lots of The Super Wallmart freinds who shopped at wallmartand waved to him. they were bad wavers because they only used one finger in the mdidle of . (AN; people do tghat to me sometimes and idk why,,, I tink its sum kool way of sayying hi..,) He was an intern at wallmart and the person he interned with was a meanie guy named Voltemort. Voltemort was in love with the pretty clerk at the store named mcgonnagel. Hary loved her 2 but he also loved the bakery lady who baked cupcakes and gave them to cripples. This is because her brother;s leg got bitten off by a giant squid. She had calimary that night. tHe only problem is that cripple-backer-cupcake-lady liked voldymort and mcgonnagal liked harry. One day hahrry was puttong tacos on The super walmort taco shelf when voldymorrtt walked up. "Hannah Montana is performing at Thje Suer Target in 15 minuites. Here is the shouvle. Lets crash that party at The Supr Targfet." "no I don't want to meet Hannah Montana I like my ladies curvy thank you very much" said hairy. (AN; this part is very violent. Warnninggg) Voldymort got angry and popinted the shpouvle at harry and shot it. Blood squirted out of harrys shoulder like a fowntin!11!!1 oh no! what did harry do? Harry didn't do anthing because he was dead. Mcgonagal cried and blew her nose on the cripples shirt. There was a cripple standing next to her who was waiting for his cupcake.

Ok. Sorry, that was my little sis. Now its time to make it cool if yoy no what I mean. Harry was ded so thje next dau they replaced him with a much hotter guy named Rupert whi liked to be called rOn, he and mcgonnagle liked eech other so they made out. They liked to make out so they got married brecasue then they could do it all the time and have it almost not be illegal. Then they had a visit from the majical wizarding stork that gave them lots of many children and told them that they were majical. 2 bad he also told voldcymort that he was majical. Voltemort hasd realised how much fun it was to kil peeps so he used a green spell that made him laugh a fnny laugh when he used it. his laugh was like this; MWAHAHAHAHA. My pet monkey pet maked that noise right be4 he died. ) Ron ands mcgonnagle (who will now be called mCkie G) 's favorite son was namded Rover (An; THAT'S MY DOGGY"S NAMRE!!!!!11!!!1 ISNT THAY PIMPIN?) Rover was a super special wizard. He was kinda emo in a smart preppy way and he was really smart. He was bi, but i dont like to jugje people like that and some people thoink that bi guys are sexii, so stfu faggots. He was superly majical and and his powers were totally kissable. He was a good kisser too but all bi guys are. He got sent to hogwarts. The principle hogwarts was voltymort because The Super Wallmart fired people who killed other peorple. dumpledore had left hogwarts because he was old and counted asa cripple so he went to get a cupcake. so anyway Rover was at hogwarts when he saw a ghost. "hi!" said the ghost "im harry potter and I want to be your friend" Everybody wanted to be Rovers' friend so it was no biggie to rover. But rover already hjung out witht the hottest guys and girls and made out with all of hois friends on a daily basis because he was sort of horny but as I said earlier I don't judge becuas im just nice like that. "No your ugly" said rover. that was a lie because harry potter was sexii but anyvodu is ugly compared to rover because he is very sexii. He was so sexii that if he was a girl ron and mcgonnagle would have named him sexii lexii but they decided not to beucase he was a boy. The Vladamort walked up and said "Let the dead boy be your friend or else I will kill you so rover let harry be his friend because h edidnt want to die. So hes kissing harry because they are friends wjen harry realized that he was straight but he didn't care because he found out that bi kids are good kissers. Of course harry was a ghost and nobody could see him but rover because rover was also a mediator so it looked like he was kissing the ari but he really wasn't because he was kissing hairy. Vokdymore walked up and said "no pda boys" and sent rover to the principlas office because of the pda. Rover thought that it would be funny to put a woopy cushun under voldymores chair so he took on out of a box of confinscated stuff in Abercrombie and fitches closet and put it on voldymores chair. When voldymore sat on it he said "this is a very naughty trick, kiddo. You should be punsished . im am sending you to Azkaban.

**AN; I just got spellchetck and it is every evil and I dotn like it because now my work is unoriginal because it computer words. Should I do a seqwal? I think it might be even sexier than this one. Oh boy oh boy!!!!!11!!!!1**


	2. Arden iz a sexxii beast groarw

**i just ad a chapter i hope u liek it but i no yo will.**

**OGM!!! STFU N009BS! YUR JUSTF LAMMING CUZ YUR JELUS MY FICCIE IS BETTR THA NYOURS!!!**

Voltymore tells rover to go to Azkaban so he about to leave when Hary flied in because he is a ghost and ghosts can fly. "he cant go to azkaban because we wil miss his smartness 2 much and nobody can maek potions as sexily as he can." All of a sudden a very prety girl named arden walk in. Arden wasnt really all that majical but she was so hott that all of a sudden Hairry was striat again (he used 2 be strait but then he kissed Rover). "hi im Hairry" said Harry. "Hi im arden" said arden "Tell me about urself "said harry. "I like choclate and nashos just not togethert said Arden "I like choclate and nachos together so maybe this relationship wont work out" said harry but arden was excepting and said that tht doesn't matter to her. "Tbat doesn't madder to me because im excepting" said Arden. Oh; I forgot to say what she was wearing, she was wearing a the souper walmart tshirt and jeens and freshly cut hair that shimmerd im teh sunlite like a Millon starrws in teh nite skii. Her jeens were light blue with littles wirlies on the butt because lotz uf prety pants have swirlies on the butt."Where do you work" said Hairy as he loked at her shirt but he wasnt reading the walmart part if you no wat I mean. "I werk at the sooper walmart wear I bake cupcakes for the cripples. Their is thsi olkd guy named Dupledore who sits bye the oven and likcs the pans who sad my bsking is so good taht it is like majic and that i shood go to hogwerts where majic is cool like crack. i dont no what crakc is tho cuz i doient live in the ghetto. my family is perfect." that is the most beautiful shtory i heard in years said harry with tears pouring fown his eyes. then he kissed Arden. Arden said"Ew you sicko! dont u no that i am going out with Rover?" said arden. harry

was real upset and he watned to die of embaress shame and jealousyt bbut he was arloready dead. So he went to old. st. nearyl hedles nick and said " hi." "hi" said Old st. nearly hedles nick. "For christmas can i be alive again" said Harriy "ok" said old st. nerly hedles nick. Then harry was alive. he was alive again. he was alive liek a person was alive. he liked to be alive. he could do people thiongs like eat real people food and really kiss real people. then he realized that there was no person he would rather kiss than Arden. beautoful arden with eyes l;ilke gyms and hair like a flowing rasinbowe. L8er that nite arden was talking to Rover on AIM on there majic competurs.

Roverissmokin: hay hunee bunches

Ardenishott: hey babe

Roverissmokin: wuts?

Ardenishott: that gohst boi kised me!

Roverishott: he is a good kisser isnt he,

Ardenissmokin: yeh but i told him that im going out with u and i dont want 2 cheat on u cuz that wood make me a bad gf and you are a good bf and i want it 2 be even and that wouldnt make it even.

Roverissmokin: yeah well he told me that you turned his str8 bcuz u r so hott

Ardenishott: yeh i am pretty hot.

Roverissmokin: so what cabun r u in?

Ardenishott: Ravenclaw

Then Rover typed a nawty word. and said that he was in grifferndure

Roverissmokin:im in grifferdoor.

Tehn Arden logged off and cried becuz she wasnt in the same cabun as rover was and they were a perfext cupol. The next day Arden was eating her grits (AN: AHHH THATS MI NAME!! DONT U LUV IT CUZ I DO!!!1) for brekfust wen this totally sexii guy walked up 2 her but she thot this wuz scary becuz that ment that he wasnt rover and that ment that she was having feelings for other guys. "oh no" she thought. "i might be having feelings 4 other guys" then she realized that this guy looked 4milliar. "hi im harry" he said and then she realized that it was really harry and that that ghost thing was just a prank so she cried again because hse was a tender emotional flower and then he put his hand on his showlder to comfert her and then she threw her grits in his face becuz h ws trying to put the moves on her and he started to cry and ten rover wlaked up and saw them cring anbd he didnt like to see his gurl cry so he started to cry . they were sitting htere crying and theyt didnt even reelize that voltymore was scemeing.

**OH NOEZ!!!!1 WAT WILL HAPIN?!1/11/!!?! ITZ A CLIFFY!!1!1!**


	3. romantec tenshun 1

**AN: _pEEPS STOP FLAAMING ME1!!!!!!!!!!!1 uR ALL JUS JELUS CUZ I CAN RITE STOIRES THAT GET MOER REVEIWS ABD R BETTERTHAN URS ADN BECAUS ROVER AND ADREN ARE KEWLER TAHN UR OCS!!!!!!! STUF, N00BZ!!!!!!!!1_**

**For those taht just strated raeding this,Harry is sad and Arrden is sad and most impotuntly Rover is sad and this is impoirtunt becuazse he is so cool becuz he is in the titul. And voltymore was skeeming if yoo didnt kno**

Violtyumore was skeeming becuz he has a plot. so rover and Arden and harrt are crying becauze arden isnt in the saem house as Rover and harry was crying becauze he had grits all over his fase. Rover thot thta harry was trying to steel Arten from him. but he stoppped cuz hArry wuz hiss freindd. then they stoped crying becuaz eHairries car startid to hert. (aN; I DONT NO HOW HARRYS CAR CAN HERT. I JUST HERD THAT IT HAPPENS IN A FANFICS A LTO.) "Why is ur car hirting? said arden. "becauze Vladimporte iz skeeming." said Hairy. "ok.," said rover. Then they wint to clas with Mr. Snape teh poshiouns mastre. "Welcome to my class" said mr .Snape the mastrt of poshiuns. mr. s,mape hated hairry bit he was reely liked Rover becuz rOver was realy reelly gud at posahuns. he made the msexily. Mr. Snape liked sexii studfients. Thay wer e making Tylonolium in poshuns. Haor;y wasmt good at poshuns so he gogt an F. Rover maid his poshun perfictly becus he was a gud studint. Ardin wazx in Mrs. Twreelannee's claz so she wazint in poshuns. "Hay Harry" said rover. "Hay rover" sed Hairy. Rover said, "Do u like rAden?" said Rover. "Yes" said harry. "Shes my girl" said roever. "I know." said Harry. "Did u kis ehr?" Said Rover? "Yes I ded" siad Harfrry. "Y?" said Rover. "Becuz i love her." saod Harrity. tehn he kisesed Rover bcuz he misssed makIng out wiht him eveery day. Rvoer bluhsed and told hARry he wuz sorry becus he missed macking out wiht harry too. Then Mr. Snape gave Hairty a detenmtion 4 tolking in class and for pda but not rover becaz he was his fav. studint. rover and arden met up at lunch whyul hairy was in detenshun. "Hi" said arden. "Hi. said Rover. "Wats up" said arden. "Nm" said Arden. "Do u like harry?" said Rover. "no." said arden. Rover is weareen a blue polo from teh same plase wear he got his woopy cooshun ((Abercrombie and

Fitch's closet)) and nice tite blakc emo pants because he was bi (AN: if u can remembur witch i theenk u can.) Rovers shirt hda trhee buttins on teh coller but he kept tehm all undun to shoow off his sexsiichest. 1 of teh coller parts was dwon but the othher waz popped in a hott sort of way. his purfict blond haire looked messie and uncomed but in a gud way and it werkd 4 him bcuz he can make NEthing werk for him. Ardne was wearing a pink shert taht showwed her middritf and a mini skirt wich wasnt alowed but no1 cared cuz she looked so sexii in it. her hair was haff bakc and long tooday and glissund in teh sunlite. Adren"s erarings wer in teh shape of a cupcacke liek she usesd to maek bakc at WaLMart. all of teh guys wantetd her to sitnext to tehm but she olny wantted to sit by Rovetr. thye were hte perfict cupple. But thay didnt no that Votymore was skeeming. But then they new becuz he wasnt at lunch and chikin nuguts are his fave. "Voltymore is skeeming." said Rover. Rover new this becuz he was asmert and smert kids no theeze thins. then harriy ghot back frum dtenshun and said "my car is herting." "Ok" said rover hoo was getting sick of Poter even tho he seckreetly luved hem.

All of a suddun sumthin hit Harryie in the hed abd it hert him!1!!!!!!1111!!

**O Noeszzzzzzz!!! anuthru Cliffiee!!!11!!!!! do u h8 me 4 this cliffie???!!?1? ooo im a terible authur 4 putting u throo this! ROFL!!!!!1**


	4. Spellchekc!

**AN: OK PEEPS! i'VE HAD PEOPUL SAY THAT I NEAD SPELL CHECK SO iM GONNA USE SPELL CHUCK ACCEPT 4 TEH WORDS THAT DONT LIKE. **

Sumthing hit Harry in the head and hurt hem. but it wuz only a roll becuz the cafeteria laddy had bad aim. it was like a idea 2 him tho or may b a angle becuz it gave him a good idea. "people cut rolls and goffs cut themselves so may b i can go goff to git over Rover." said Harry to himself. Then Harry went upstairs and changed so he was goff. Then haorty went upstairs to his cabun and changed. he was wearing a black cape and makeup and chains becuz thats what goffs where . When he came back downstairs he saw that Voltymore still wasn't their. Then he 8 sum food and a few minutes later Volt more was there. Harry asked '"Were were u?" harry asked. "I was skeming" siad Voltymore who had been skeming. Harry cold over Arden and rOver and said "voltymore had Ben skeming." "We must protect my parents b4 he does sumthin bad 2 them. said Rover. "quick lets get on my sidekick fone and book airplanes 2 go home" said Arden who then held up her sidekick. "My parents dont like goffs tho" said Rover. Then Harry rawred at him bcuz that is what goffs do to pretty people. (AN: I have never met a reel goff becuz I go to a special boreding scool btu i have herd about tehm.) Then Hairy saw this guy from acros the cafiteria and said "whos dat." As a person in some fanfiction described him;; Draco Malfoy had long hair that fell in his eyes, kind of like Sawyer from Lost, so he almost blind. He was built, like all writers say, thanks to Quidditch. There was nothing else intersting about him, like his personalitly, so let's move on. "Tha t is Draco" said Arten who was a new student but she wuz smart so she new evry1. So Harry walked up 2 draco and said "Hi. Ur hot do u want 2 help us save Rovers partetns?" Then Draco sed "No Ludicrous Voltymorf is my dad adn I dont want to inturopt his skemeing.' Then draco told his dad that people were inturrupting his skeeming. S C E E N C H A N G U S . Ardent harry and most importunrlu Rover were on a plane to Walmart where his mom and dad worked. Then something happend...

**I wood like 2 thank my frend Hedwig199 for letting me cwote them. im sry i wasnt able to ask if i cood cwote becuz it sed that i coodnt private message him but i no that he wood let me. Hedwig is reely nice and dedicated a hole chapter 2 me but i wasnt able to reed it all the way bcuz i got sorta bored and it was dinner time and i was hungry. not 2 many peeple r commenting nemore and it is mking me sad. i did w/e u told me 2 so can u pleeze comment now? this is gunna b my last entry until maybe 2007 becuz i am going on vacatshun but i cant tell u wear becuz then u wood stolk me and rap me. Ok so coment. k i luv u!!!1xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxxo!!!11!111 my teecher told me 2day that that meens hugs + kissies bczuz the os are mouths for kissies and the xs are the rms crossing 4 teh hugs. i dont like spellcheck very much but tell me wat u think and if i should keep it up. i kept the words that looked cooler the waty i spelled them cuz thats what makes it teh besdt part. **


	5. Tayler Hickkzz q

**hello peeps!!!11 im sooo sry I coodnut right l8ly bczz ive been bizy. eyev givin up on spelcheck cuz itz a meeny. where I last left of teh careters were bak ibn walmart. and then sumthin hapined. peeps have been yelin me cuz I made stuff 2 **

**spacy so im gonna + parugraffs but my language teacher isnt vary good. sum people are meen 2 me and i reely want them 2 stop cuz i kept putin good stuff on peeps who were nice 2 mes storys. im a nice persun but if u r mean i h8 u.**

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arden n rover n gost harry r in walmart and then sumthin happined. the thing that happined was they stubbed

there toes 2 go count aas cripples

and they went to go git cupcakes but teh line wuz 2 long so they all got reely hungry and tried to eet hairy cuz he was gofff and 2 kool 4 dat, but he was a gfof and they coodnt eet him so they ate Cheezenips while listining 2 taylor hicks (**a.n Hes my favorite scenger and i saw him live 1se and he hit on me cuz im hotttttt**) but than they got kiked owt 4 steelingf stuf. Hairy asked"wat do

do we do now?" Harry adked as he rubed his haff mising arm (thay had tryed to eaten him). "idk. shut up cripple" sed arden as she made out with tayler hicks's pic she had stolin. cUz tehy was majic his arm gruw bak. then they saw that ron n mcgonnigle were in teh colset and hary screemd "ron and momgonagle are in the closert" said hary cuz he had just made a pun cuz hes smrat liek dat. (**Heres 2 all thoes h8ers out hteir, I'M SMART TOO!!1 MY STORY GETS MOTR REVE3WS TJAN URS SDO IT MUST B BERTTER!**) they solwly wetn up2 het closeit dor and openrd it. something was vrey rong but it wasunt voldymort cuz he wuz 2 busie skeeming. no. the thing dat wuz ron was that ron and mcgooglega were makin out. He skereemed "AHHHHHGHHGHHHHHHHHJJHH

HHHHHHHHH  
H" skreemed hairty .

"Stuped boy shut up" sed mCkie G (in chapie 1 she chagnd hre naem for those woh dont' no) tehn harry got upset and cut himsefl cuz remimbur hes goff. but he coodnt sit in his spechul corner n rite sogns cuz ssum1 wuz stnndin their. Hary asked"woos stanfin in my corner?" he asked. the voice sed "it is i voldymore cuz im done skeeming and im gonna kill u unles u do a task 4 me." "k." do uu no what the task was? i dont. lets

let voldenore speek. "the task is to go to rooin the taylor hicks consert at teh super targfhuit. " hary was in a pickul cuz he luved Arden bcuz she was butiful but he didnt want 2 die and he aslo lovded Rover and Tyalor Hikks. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" sed arden as hariy reached for the brown hare die. then she startred to make out wiht hary and then rover got jelus. just as arden sed "does this bring bak memorees of cripples and cupcakes" rover spiled the hare die on harys hed cuz dats y he wuz caled harry cuz he has hare. "fool" sed hairy "my hare is alredy brown. " then the 3 of them made out a ton and sumhow vlodymort got pulled into it. then dumpledore baked sum cookies but that wasnt hte only thing bakin cuz this wuz getting hot. but all wile this wuz hapining tatylor hicks wuz singing at tehg super targiert.

"were runin out of time!" sed hary. so they ran nektz dor 2 teh supper target. "im comin wit u" screemedd arden. she was wearing a medeum blue wosh pare of jeens wit a red henlee and sum chucks and blue sox, even tho no 1 weres sox with chucks it worked for her cuz everythin deos becuz hses so prettifull. as arden and rover were runin 2 teh supper tarfjet thye had 1 of those romantic conversashuns. "do u luv me?" aksed rover. "yess." sed ardem cuz she luved rover cuz he was so hottt nad wuz wearin kaki shortz and a green polo. "do u luv me?" sked arden. "yess." he sexily sed. "do u think im sexy?" "yessss. do u love hariy." then their wuz a silince as deep as win i stabbed myslef in the lefg to see if my jeens were as stron as thety say they r.

**ooohhhh a liffie!!!! P.S. the jeens weernt**

**i tihnk i im gonna take a myspace survay but my mommy wont let me have a mhyspace. so im puttin it where my reel frends r. this 1s called "deep survay cuz i think im deep cuz all riters r except 4 teh 1s who h8 me.**

**Who are you? **bianca. this iznt very deep.

**What keeps you awake at night? **flamerz. they give me nitemares n i cant sleep at nite.

**If you could go back in time and change one thing, what would it be? **i wood make mysefl priinsess of teh unuvurse!!1

**Are you happy with your life at the moment? **yes but i wisg i cood hav had tacos for dienner.

**What do you like most about yourself? **mi madddddd ritinggggg skilllzzzzzzzz and mi sexii bodie.

**Do you ever wish you were somebody else? **i wish i wuz arden so i cood make out with rover.

**What's the worst thing anybody has ever done to you? **FLAME MEEEE ANDN MAKE MYSELF MY CRY MYELF 2 SLEE1!!

**Do you have a dark secret you've never told anybody? **i ounce acidently flushd my pet gerbul down teh toiliet and sed he ran away

**What do you like the most about your friends? **I liek theere sarckasim wen they tel me 2 go away and how they alwayz suport mi riting and think itz funny and tell me im 2 good 2 studie 4 speling.

**Have you ever come close to dying? **yea wen i stabed my leg wiht a nife.

**What thing do you want most in the world? **to get pubblishd and maek a cd with taytlor hicks.

**How do you want to be remembered when you die? **hot and smert.

**What do you never take for granted? **teh luv of the revewers who luv my storys so STFU FLAMMERSSSSS


	6. romantec tenshun 2

**okayyzzzz! time 4 anuthur fun filed chaptir!!1! sao far stuf has hapind and ardin jest askd rover if he luvs hary.**

rover didnt no wat 2 say so rover sed "i dont no wat 2 say" sed Rovur. "wel say sumthin or else ill steel ur shuvol and u wil have 2 b a taler hikcs teeney" sed aRden. "ohkay sed rover cuz he didtn watn 2 b a teeney.

rover took a breeth deep an dsed "i do luv" sed rover "hairy.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" screemd Arden!11

"dont werry"sed rover" its alwrite 4 me 2 luv hAry cuz im bi wich make me sexy and cuz u 2 wewre difren't gendurs its legal"

"o oky. btw did i tel u i love Voldymortt stil?" saked Arden.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" sed rover! Vloldimert was teh ebil! tehn he ran bak 2 harry 2 maek out. "lets be marrys so itz not ilegal." sed hary. "no i want 2 b teh rebul" sed rover. but teh same time he wuz thinkin how grate it wood b 2 be maryed 2 both hAry **and** arden (A/N we lernd about mormons 2day in clas! THey can dou that.) tehn they pretended pretended 2 b eSkimo's and kised sum more but wit tehir eyelashis.

Rover had blond-ish, reddish, black hare sexily stiled. but he had blue streeks in it cuz he was bi. he had teh body of a god and a face of an angle. his beutifful purpol eyes shimmied with a courter tern and his natruly red lips were. he wuz tan with pale skin and a perfict knose.

Arden had shinie red hare but she wished it wuz teh coler of taler hicks'z but it didnut flatur her pinkish-redish-brownish-peachish lips, witch were curintly coverd in purple lipstik which matchd rovdrs eyes bcuz they were bf and gf remembndr even tho rover luved harfy. her perfect blu eyes sparkuled w/ teh blueness of pools of windex and other blu liquids. (**A/N liekt he pools at teh YMCA or at teh speshul olimpics**.)

Hary had blak haire and brown eyes dat truned green wen he wuz a gost just like his hare turned wite (**a/n ongz just like danny fantum**) and ardin wuz jelius cuz dshe wunted tdat ghost hare. he wuz wereing baggy blak pants wit skulls and flamez around childrin on tehm cuz he wuz goff and likesd dat kidn of stuf. his shirt sed i h8 every1 cuz he did.

"this iz romantic" sed Hgarry. "indede" sed rovir. tehn he is honted by his past.

wen rover wuz 4 his dad (ron) turns evul 4 a weeak and sold his bike 4 munee. do u no wat ron bot w/ that munee? he bot sum makeup- makup 4 teh ladey he was cheetting on Mickee-G wit. teh other lady loked lyke a hors adn smeled like mi gerbul b4 i flushde it. her name wuz Herrmynee. 1 day micky-g wakled in on tehm kisin eech other. Micky-g sed "oh no!" sed myky-g! she was shkoked!1! so seh went goff and amde out w/ a ghostlee boi. tehn she stoped being goff cuz she got borred. Ron got boredd wifth hermyney, and went bak to Mcky-G. All wuz well. sudenly Rover reelized dat boy wuz named harry!11

"do you love my mom?" asked Rovir.

"is ur mom hot?" aksed Hairy.

"her name is Mcgonaglegle btu we cal her mickee-g 4 sohrt cuz she is teh gangsta queen!1"

"i thot she wuz goff" sed harry.

rover loked at him teh nice way peeps look me n sed "no dats u stuipd.!

Harry sed "o sry!1" sed hairy cuz he wuz sry.

S\ /E\ /N\ /H\ /N\ /U\

\C/ \E/ \C/ \A/ \G/ \S

mEenwile arden wuz the tayler hicks consert moshin w/ a shuvol. Tehn she made out w/ taler Hicks. then she reelized she didnt luv him. then she reelized she didtn luv harry. hTen seh reelized she didnt luv Rovewr. Then she reelized she maybee luvd rover just a littul. But then she reelized teh guy she lvued the mots wuz vladigmore cuz u can nevir 4get ur tru luv. i meen sum luv dies like gerbils but my mimoree of sCruffy wil nevre dye.

Tehn Arden reelized dat Vogldtmoret wuz her gerbil. And shhe cryed cuz she just tehn figered it owt.

**i put a lot of thot in dis one cuz i have a awsum anolgee. i meen onyl teh bste riter ever cool compear luv 2 gerbils. i am a beest and u smell!!11**


	7. TEH EBIL

**A lots of peeps haev ben totesly meen 2 me wit there flams and or commints.!1 y cant u jest except me as a reel peeps? wat did i do 2 u? my momy tels me im a lil angle.**

**sumaree: arden has jest reeklised dat vladimore is her gerbul (A.N. dat menes she luvses hmi in case ur stuped (im not) if u dont no waht i meen, reed teh chappie be4 this 1.**

ardin has jest reelized dat voldymore isd he gerbulk. so she stoped mackign out w/ tayler hicks and sum sexxii guy nameed Fierfox **(AN you no who u R!)** and her ran ova 2 hims.

"Hi vOldymoret' arden saed. "Yo ARdne. still lookin fine i seee" saed Vodlymort."I alwyas looke fiine. saied arden "so wutsup?" she askeed to hiom. "nm." "oks. hey what do you tihnk of meh?" He lookeded at her hawt bodii

and tehn ansered "yur hawt duh!" "Nu! tahnts not waht i meen! as a persun!" "Oh" he sed. "Ur a nice gurl." she shooked her hed. "is taht all tere is 2 me? juts a nice gurl?" Vilodymote shurged. "im ebil. i dunt care." wif that ardn burst in2 teers. (**A/N u toht I wuz gonna say flammes, rite? ha ha!)** "NOEZ! cant u see? tehere's mor to me tahn that! im not jest reely sexii and nise. I havfe a brilent persunalty. a Persunalaty taht lurves juu!!!!1!""" Veotltmyolt pawsed and tehn sed "okey." wich made arden crye evem morre. "cant u see paast teh reely sexxiiness of meh and see teh reel persun inside... and luv it??" "Nope' he told hur. "IUm evbil remeber?' and tehn he lefted her to crie on hur ouwn.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!11" she screemd lyke dat gey hoo weres teh blakc sute n has a glowey sord. (**A/N i tihnk his nam is chad vater...or mayb his ebil bruthur...idk i fel a sleeppe durin dat moovie.)**

tehn ardin desided dat becuz vlodimoryt wuz evbul she shood go evul hesulf. "im gonna go evil mysulf" sed ardein. shee put on a evbul outfut but she lockeed goff so seh tooke it of adn put on a betterone. seh had a purpul n blak miniskirt with littl swirliyes on teh butt-ons **(git it? its buttins on teh but!1 lolz!) ** tehn tehr wuz blak lace on teh edges of teh skirt wich mad it look ebil and tehn she wore a corsit topp. it wuz blak wit more ebil lase on it. it sed "evbil" in pink on it bcuz pikn is not a goff culler so she wuznt gooff. (**an im never seen a reel goff b4 cuz of mi spechul skool but i hears abot dem**) seh has thi-high kick-asse comnbat boouts wit more evbil lase. tehm she had gluvs wit lil flamexs aroumd childrun on dem. but dey were pink flams so it wuznt gof. sh3e died her hare wite jest like tayler hikcs adn gost harry and danny fantum and dik cheney (**a/n cuz hes evul 2)** but she put blak streeks in it 2 remend peeps shez olso evbil. hse had lot of meny neklacese on cuz dont u no, necklices r sexxiiiii. "im redy 2 b evbil!s" sed arden wit an evul laff. cuz she new taht vlroinfmore needeed an aprintcess adn she wuz tehn only 1 hawt enuff to do tweh jorb.

.:S:..:C:..:E:..:E:..:N:..:C:..:H:..:A:..:N:..:G:..:U:..:S:.!1

becuz teh crises had ben advertid hary and teh sexii rover went bak on teh magicul plain 2 hagworts. "it wuz good 2 se me parints agin" sed rover. "espeshully ur mom" sed harry hoo stil luved her but not as much as rovir and he dindt tehink she wuz as sexii as ardin cuz no1 but rover is as sexii as arden. suddinley there wuz dis guy names Druplusspike on teh plain hoo tryed relesing sum snakes on teh plaine so rovir pointed his wond him and udes a majical spel on him and he dide and no1 cared except teh snakes but harry terned dem n2 gerbuls and no1 carde eether (**A/N! see I told u I'd add u in teh storeee!1 If u wont u cood add me in urs storree dat wood b awsum!1) **har yand rovir flerted sum more. rover sexilee put his hed in harries hare and sniffed. "wat r u doin?"askde hariy. "inhaleing teh luvlines dat is u" sed rover. "oh. ok." sed hary hoo den petid rovirs hare in a sexi way and den teh made out but it wuz ok cuz no1 saw dem cuz it wuz a majic plane. but liltle did tehy no dat ardien had terned trater on dem and dat vladymore wuz skeeming agin!

**AN ohh noezz!1 anuther cliffie!! wat wil u do!!?**

**P.S. i upd8ed my profyle chekc it owt 4 awsumness!1**

**P.P.S. if u wont u cood b in my storee!1 but be nice 2 me nad put a sexii gurl nammed bianca in urs!**


	8. JACK ATTAk!

**sOrry abot teh lak of updaet.i had lise. **

**oh btw STOPP FLAMMINING MEE!!!!!!!!!!!1 I AM ANOTEHR HUMEN BEEING TOO!! U PEEPLE MAEK ME KRY MISELF TO SLEAP!! STOPP IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 STFFFFFFUUUUUUU!1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1**

**Sumery; ardin hjas don a benadickt arnuld (wateva that meens...,)n joinded teh vlajgimord. rovir n hary dont no bcuz they r 2 busy ilegully macking out.**

ardem gone evil. but she wuz a sexii ebil **(an. anytihng ardin dos ish sexxiieful. duh.0**. but teh man she go evli 4(**aN. remmembre! Vlaotnatot)** dodnt like her bak. "y odnt u lick me bak?" seh askeded him wen she fist shoewed him her neew evol self. "oh. wowzirs. u go ebil 4 me. dat mack me feel speshul. i will mayb consedur it." sed voldimhore. "coolio. reely?" sed rdin. "relay."sed vlaghulio. "yayness" sed rden. tehn she cheerded in an ebil way cuz she wuz evil now (**AN. but it was still sexxi) **!!!11

12!!!!!!!!!!!3 "cood i b ur luv mokee?" asksed arden. "not yet."sed volhymore "i is stile kunsierdeing it." "ok." sed ariemden. Then she wetn too do stuf.

"okye i hav devided how i can b ur luv momkee" sed vlolahimoret. "yoo have 2 conpleet a task!" Vothentbtm sed. aRdemn cam bak frum doin stuff and maed a smily fase aty him.

ScEnEcHaNGuS1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1!1! (**an. look at mah prettay parterns!#$&()**

3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3 3

rovir n hariy gots bak 2 teh hogwertz. "sumthins mising" sed rovir cuz he was sexxily observent. tehn he reelised ardein wuznt here. but he dudnitn care bcuz hrrya wuz atacheded to his lips agin and tehn thye sterted macking oot. 'i luv yo'" sed haryr. i luv u 2 sed rover. tehn they kisued sum moer. Hafrry taysted liek choklat. Roviert wondiered y butt tehn he remimberd taht haRRty had bin eeting sum erlier. It wuz now sexxi choklat

tehn draco mouthoy come in. he had a gf!1111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111 her name wuz Aderaiana. she wuz reely toll and had sexiiii legs. but not as sexiiiiiiiiii as aredins thought rovie. but tehn he reelized his legs wqere sexiiierrrrrrr!1  
!!!!!1

adreinanana wolked up 2 rovir and sed "I'm Adriana, I'm 7'4 with short black brown blonde red hair, bra size F, 87 lbs. MAKE ME DRACO'S GIRLFRIEND OK?!?!?!?!?!?!?!" "ok" sed roviir. he didnt no waht wuxz happining and she kinnd of scarred him.

hary sterted cring for no resson but he wuz hiary so every1 but snape luved him stile.

suddinely sumbodyt colled rovirs sidekick. "UHOH!1 sed rovir! sumbody has kidnaped mcie G!1!1 ( **An: mckie g is mcogonangoolgey. aka rovers mom.)**

"uh o" sed rovir "the only way wee can reskue her is 2 go 2 an all time low consert driessed up like teh jonis brothurs!1!!"\

"but wes just got here!11!" sed harry hoo felft whiny and wonted 2 kiss rover sum moar." Tehn i will let u have first pik on teh jonas bvrothur u wont 2 b." sed rover. "i wanna be joe jomis" sed harry. "ok. sed rovie" ill be kevin sed rover. then all of a suddin a persun nammed pokyeman cospby wolked in and sed "cood i b chad jonis?" ok. sed rovier and harry together cuz tehy were a couple adn they didd tihngs liek taht.

at teh all time low consert ardin held mcgonagooldy hostage and jher shuvle was keepign guard. "HEY LOOK! ITS TEH JONAS BRUTHERS!!" SHOWTED JACK WHOO WUZ A GUY IN TEH BAND OF TEH ALL TIME LOW!!!!1 jack wuz reely sexy. almost as much as tayler hicks so rovir wuz jelus so pokeyman cosby aka chad jonas made out with hinm.

**oooo1!!1 i cleefieee 1!1 teh plot tehickens!1! IM HUNGRIE!!!1**


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